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Years ago, our parents would’ve balked at the idea of making a living by being an influencer, a “professional” cuddler, eating food loudly in front of a microphone, or even being a life coach. There are even Youtubers making large amounts of money doing strange things like rolling their face all over loaves of bread (yes, that’s a thing).
And then there’s being a sugar baby, which is actually one of the craziest things I’ve ever tried to do for money. Yes, Yours Truly has a story for you.
While Breadfaceblog may be giggled at, sugar babies face a bit more of a negative response – they’re commonly confused with prostitutes, although most of the time, they’re far from it.
Before you judge, you should probably know that the rise of sugar babies is partially due to the rise of college tuition and students’ inability to pay them off. In fact, USC and UCLA are 2 of many college schools in the US that have a large number of students living double lives as sugar babies. What’s a student to do when she’s gotta eat, pay rent, and can’t get a job because she’s a full-time student?
Sugar baby, sugar.
What Exactly Is a Sugar Baby?
A “sugar baby,” or escort, is a person who is paid to be a companion, usually by someone who can afford to pay for the sugar baby’s lifestyle. Think, “the girlfriend experience.”
Sugar daddies are usually wealthy men who desire a companion to go on travels, need someone to share their darkest secrets with, or have to bring someone to networking events to play the role of “girlfriend” (or “boyfriend!”). Contrary to popular belief, not many sugar daddies seek sugar babies solely for sex – most often, they just want company. Ultra-rich people running billion-dollar industries usually don’t have time for nurturing a long-term relationship or a family, so some may find it easier to pay a sugar baby for their company and set up an appointment with them that fits into their busy schedule.
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Just like regular dating, sugar daddies might have different expectations for their sugar babies: some might want a girlfriend, a dinner date, a grieving shoulder to cry on, a therapist to unload baggage with, a travel buddy, a business apprentice, or maybe just someone trustworthy that they can complain to.
In exchange for their time, sugar babies are given money. Some sugar babies are given a scheduled “allowance,” and some may be paid per meeting. Other times, they can opt to have their bills taken care of – it’s fairly common for a sugar baby to have their monthly rent, utilities, and phone bill paid for by their sugar daddy. Payment terms are formally discussed between the sugar baby and daddy, and with some serious full-time sugar babies, may even require a contract.
In the end, it’s no different from your average “gold-digger” individual seeking wealthy partners. The only difference is that in a sugaring relationship, your company and time is valued in the form of money.
Yes, Sugar Babies Can Actually Make F*ck Ton of Money
Sometimes they can make so much that they might have to report their wages to the IRS and legitimize their business. Just like running any other business, making good money from sugaring requires you to be business savvy. Sara-Kate knows: she made $5,000 by going on vacation for a week and quit her job immediately afterward.
Although cash is king, some sugar babies may only sugar recreationally and are still completely happy with receiving gifts in exchange for their time. Many sugar babies typically receive copious amounts of luxury handbags, shoes, cars, or even fun trips to the Maldives with their sugar daddy, all expenses paid.
Now don’t get to thinking you can put yourself out there and make $5,000 in one night. It’s possible, but the likelihoods are slim for your first chance. In order to make good cake, you have to understand social cues, be charismatic, and understand psychology in order to find and keep a sugar daddy.
How Does Sugaring Work?
One of the most common methods of finding a potential sugar daddy is through Seeking Arrangement, a dating website for aspiring sugar babies to connect with rich sugar daddies. Being a part of SA involves creating an account and waiting for your profile to be approved before you are granted full access to the website. The process is similar to other dating apps: you can search for users, browse suggested users, send messages, and vice versa.
Much like regular dating, your odds are good only if you are an appealing person to potential suitors. For SA, the key is to create an interesting profile that’s sure to spark interest.
Don’t expect sugar daddies to find you attractive and then immediately set up recurring payments to your PayPal account either. Most often, you will have to go on a date with the person of interest and win their approval before they’ll even want to start handing over money. And in order to hit the “jackpot,” you need to find a partner who you’re not only comfortable with, but also agrees to your arrangement.
For tips on how to refine your sugar skills, you can visit one of the most popular websites Let’s Talk Sugar for tons of tips and stories from sugar babies around the Internet.
Sugar Daddies Can Be Your Business Mentor or Investor Too
There is one huge benefit that is often overlooked within sugaring, and it’s the potential to gain a business mentor, or even better – an investor.
Sugar daddies are wealthy enough to provide for another individual’s lifestyle, so you can also learn a lot about running a successful business from your daddy. In fact, he could very much open doors for you with money to invest in your dream business or offer a career opportunity that wouldn’t be available to you otherwise.
Although being a sugar baby is often associated with being the “mistress” of a wealthy man, it’s not uncommon to have a mentor-based sugaring relationship completely absent of romance. At the end of the day, your daddy could wind up being a valuable asset in your list of networking contacts.
Being a Sugar Baby is Only As Scary as You Allow it to Be
It’s understandable to be frightened to go on a date with a stranger in exchange for money, but in reality, the nerves are really no different than meeting someone for the first time through Tinder. Finding a sugar daddy on Seeking Arrangement or finding a late-night hookup on Tinder both require being sensible and avoiding potentially scary shady situations.
There are also many stories about sugar babies being trapped in violent relationships with sugar daddies, but most often, this is unfortunately no different than dating a manipulative narcissist who justifies mental or physical abuse towards their partner. Again, avoiding scary situations (paid or unpaid) require making sensible and safe choices. Do not ever, ever, ever, put yourself in harm’s way by placing yourself in uncomfortable situations.
Escorting Vs. Prostitution
Alright, let’s clear the air: although there is a difference between escorting and prostitution, there is a very fine line in-between, and being an escort can be like dancing with danger in the eyes of the law. Many DAs and law enforcement may consider escorting as a black-and-white as prostitution, so err on the side of caution. Obviously, anything contractual that requires things like sexual favors is clearly prostitution. Sex should never be expected, but if this is a potential daddy’s must-have, take it as a red flag and find another daddy that will better respect your boundaries.
Here’s a similar example: while being a stripper is legal, a stripper could easily be charged for prostitution and solicitation if she were to entertain a private bachelor party in a hotel room and then offer sexual favors in secret. So really, it’s a matter of crossing that line that you should never do.
Remember that in the eyes of the law, saying anything other than a clear “no” in response to being asked for sexual favors will be regarded with blatant disapproval in court. Do not ever agree to sexual favors – I cannot stress this enough!
Additionally, laws vary from state to state and country to country, so it’s important to check with your local laws to see where escorting falls into and whether or not the law sees it parallel to prostitution.
So No, It’s Not Recommended For Over-Thinkers
I wasn’t able to move forward with sugaring because I had a tendency to over-think and panic at the sheer thought of it.
Years ago when I was flat-broke and in a frenzy to make money, some of my sugar baby friends recommended that I try sugaring. I asked them many questions (especially the ones about legalities), discussed it with my boyfriend (who wasn’t too jazzed up about it, but understood my financial crisis and tried to be okay with it), and created an account on Seeking Arrangement.
I really wanted a business mentor or an investor who could help me with creating what is now The Baller on a Budget. When I was stricken with the idea of becoming a sugar baby, I was laid off of work and had also been thinking about creating this blog for quite some time. At the time, I envisioned The Baller on a Budget to be a huge lifestyle publishing website like Lauren Conrad. But because I feared failure so much, I decided to try out sugaring first because it seemed like a more attainable goal.
After spending hours on crafting a profile that resembled everyone’s dream girl, I finally got approved and started hunting for potential sugar daddies. The messages eventually rolled in, and I started entertaining them.
At first, my boyfriend and I would sit together laughing and crafting up responses to these men in a game-y fashion, trying to bait a big fish. I found it easy to figure out what their dream girl was and say the right words to entertain the conversation.
I stayed in touch with one man in particular, and eventually, we got to the point of scheduling our first date. Abruptly, he demanded to hop on a phone call with me, because he wanted to see more of my personality before going on a date. I was a bit flustered because I was living at my boyfriend’s house, and although he knew about my sugaring project, something about the whole situation made me feel almost disloyal to both him and myself.
In the end, I couldn’t even make the phone call. I dreaded the idea of having to hide my new side hustle to my friends and family out of fear of being judged. I thought about the paranoia I’d have to face with the legalities involved. I thought about my insecurities, the anxiety of having to reject sex, or potentially meeting a psychopath. And most importantly, I thought about being dishonest towards myself by pretending to be someone I wasn’t in order to dig into someone else’s pockets.
Years later, I feel like I made the right choice to skip sugaring and take my chances at starting my blog, which was a success. It doesn’t put me in harm’s way, I get to be myself all the time, and I make money by doing something I love every single day.
Even though I didn’t have the full sugar baby experience, I’m sure there are many people out there who feel confident enough to navigate the world that is the sugar bowl. I’ve met people who have sugared for years and had the time of their lives, while others and I couldn’t even gather up the courage to go on a date. It’s definitely not for everyone, but if you’re comfortable with meeting people online, have a penchant for entertaining a good conversation, and want to be spoiled, it could be worth a try.
What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done for money? Would you ever try being a sugar baby? Let’s chat in the comments below! Don’t forget to subscribe to my newsletter and follow me on Instagram for more interesting money stories, tips and tricks.
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